And this is what it comes down to: waiting. Always waiting, waiting for something, half the time I'm not even sure what. But waiting, nonetheless, as if I ever possessed the patience to do so.
But it seems the right thing to do right now. Not waiting for the things I've waited for before; or is it? Waiting for... an opportunity. How absurd.
But the difficult thing is she expressed the same intention as I, to wait for this. And I have to wonder, why then, we're waiting at all.
Its so difficult to remind myself why; it would be easy to get into this, to try to make it work; but would we have to pretend? That's the one thing I can't do. I can let things go, I can let things slide, but I can't pretend things never happened (though sometimes I wish to, to make it easier, if only for my own sake) and I can't pretend everything is fine; that much I know. But the rest... the rest is up in the air, and I find myself holding my breath waiting for it to fall.
(Is that what it is? A fall?)
Why can't anything ever just come gently?
...this doesn't express my sentiment at all.
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